Kinky Questions, make me uncomfortable--go!

  • 1: Kitchen Counter, Couch, or on top of the dryer? dryer, while its running
  • 2: Your last sexual encounter: Good or Bad and why: good. i came.
  • 3: A fictional person that you think would be good in bed: Leeloo, from The Fifth Element
  • 4: Something that never fails to make you horny: rain
  • 5: Where is one place you would never have sex: any place where i will get caught and put in jail, such as the middle of a crowded mall.
  • 6: The most awkward moment during a sexual experience was when: my mom caught me masturbating in her room while she was sleeping
  • 7: Weirdest thing that ever made you horny: washing dishes.
  • 8: What is the best way to sexually bind someone: Handcuffs, Rope, or Other [if other please explain]: rope
  • 9: What is the fastest way to make you horny: tell me you want me to fuck your ass
  • 10: Top or bottom? a little of both
  • 11: We were about to: eat some ice cream, but then: i came, and she ate it with a spoon
  • 12: Is one orgasm enough? Are multiple orgasms necessary? it depends. if the first one was intense, and satisfying, then yes. if it left me unsatisfied, ill need another
  • 13: Something that you have hidden in your room that you don’t want anyone to find: nothing. i am not ashamed of anything.
  • 14: Weirdest nickname a significant other has ever called you: gwenny
  • 15: Two things you like [or dislike] about oral sex: (receiving) when they're not into it... just don't even bother. go all in or don't do it at all. (giving) when they're enjoying themselves quietly. make some fucking noise.
  • 16: Weirdest sexual act some has performed [or tried to perform] on/with you: continuing to have sex with my wife while her sister walked in, not shocked in the slightest, and started having a boring conversation with us.
  • 17: Have you ever tasted yourself? [If no, would you?] [If yes, what did you think?] yes. a bit salty
  • 18: Is it ever okay to not use a condom: yes. ive only ever used a condom when having sex with a prostitute. all else has been bare back.
  • 19: Who was the sexiest teacher you ever had? cant remember ever having a sexy teacher
  • 20: A food that you would like to use during a sexual experience: pickles
  • 21: How big is too big: when it wont fit
  • 22: One sexual thing you would never do: id never put someone's head in my ass. not the head of their dick, i mean their actual cranium. skull. whatever.
  • 23: Biggest turn on: anal
  • 24: Three spots that drive you insane: my navel, my lips, my cock (duh)
  • 25: Worst possible time to get horny: while giving a presentation at school
  • 26: Do you like it when your sexual partner moans: hell yes
  • 27: Worst sexual idea you ever had: wanting to burn my ass hole with fire
  • 28: How much fapping is too much fapping: when it starts to bleed from the friction is probably a good time to stop
  • 29: Best sexual complement you ever got: "it's a good size"
  • 30: Bald, landing strip, Jumanji: jumanji? wtf. landing stip at least
  • 31: Is it good sex if you don’t nut: no it is not
  • 32: Fill in the blank: "If they -watch-, we are fuckin"
  • 33: What your favorite part of your body: my mouth
  • 34: Favorite foreplay activities: bondage
  • 35: Love (>,<, or =) Sex For those of us who don’t remember our math thats “greater than, less than, or equal to] love is greater than sex
  • 36: What do you wear to bed? shorts, commando. sometimes t-shirt too
  • 37: When was the first time you masturbated: when i was 6
  • 38: Do you have any nude/masturbating pictures/video of yourself? lots
  • 39: Have you ever/when was the last time you had sex outside? yesterday
  • 40: Have/would you ever have sex outside? yes i have
  • 41: Have/would you ever had a threesome? yea i have
  • 42: What is one random object you’ve used to masturbate? the legs of a chair
  • 43: Have/would you ever masturbate at work/school? yes i have
  • 44: Have/would you ever have sex on a plane? yes i have
  • 45: What is one song you’d like to have sex to? "detachable penis"
  • 46: What is something nonsexual that makes you horny? rain
  • 47: Most attractive celebrity? charlize theron
  • 48: Do you watch gay/lesbian porn? why/why not? yes i do, both. cuz sometimes im just in that kind of mood, you know.
  • 49: If a child was born on the occasion of the last time you had sex, how old would that child be right now? in what, hours? minutes? like 6 hours old
  • 50: Has anyone ever posted nude pictures of you online? yes i have
  • 51: What is one thing that NEVER makes you horny? im pretty sure that anything has the possibility to make me horny. but if you must have an answer, then William Shatner, or Rosanne Barr, or world peace. whatever
  • 52: Do you have stretch marks? (How do you feel about them? Has anyone ever had a problem with them?) yes. don't care. no
  • 53: Do you like giving head? (why/why not) love it. oral fixation. it turns me on
  • 54: How do you feel about tattoos on someone you are interested in? hot as fuck.
  • 55: How would you feel about taking someones virginity? no big deal.
  • 56: Is there any food you would NOT recommend using during a sexual encounter? hot sause
  • 57: Is there anything you do on Tumblr that you would not like your significant other to see? no
  • 58: Do you own any sex toys? (what is it? (how long have you had it?) yes. big ones. they are about 15 years old
  • 59: Would you give your significant other unrestricted access to your Tumblr for a day? sure.
  • 60: Would you be offended if your significant other suggested you get plastic surgery? no.
  • 61: Would you rather be a pornstar or a prostitute? prostitute
  • 62: Do you watch porn? of course
  • 63: How small is too small? my dick is too small. thats how small.
  • 64: Have you ever been called a freak? Why? all the time. because, im a freak. duh.
  • 65: Who gave you your last kiss? Did it mean anything? wife. of course. love
  • 66: Would you switch phones with your significant other for a day? sure
  • 67: Do you feel comfortable going "commando"? do it all the time
  • 68: Would you have a problem with going down on someone if they hadn't shaved their pubic hair? no
  • 69: If you could give yourself head, would you? id never leave the couch
  • 70: Booty or Boobs? booty all day long
  • 71: If you had a penis, what would you name it? chester
  • 72: Have you ever been on an official date? yes
  • 73: Have you ever cheated on someone? (Why?) not really
  • 74: If you were a stripper, what would your name be? Spanky Fart Box
  • 75: Have you ever had sex in your parents bed? (Would you?) yes i have
  • 76: How would you react if you found out your parents had sex in your bed? who cares
  • 77: What was your reaction the first time you saw a penis/vagina? "cool"
  • 78: If you had a penis/vagina for a day, what are five things you would do? if i had a vag for a day... fuck that. who wants a vag, really? gross.

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